made　me　in　Venice　using　adulterated　gold　and　brought　me　here；　passing　me

off　as　twenty…two…carat　Ottoman　gold。　Your　sympathy　and　understanding　are

much　obliged。

Based on what I could gather from being in the mint in Venice； this

business has been going on for years。 Until recently； the debased gold pieces

that　the　Veian　infidels　brought　to　the　East　and　spent　were　Veian　ducats

which they minted in that same mint。 We Ottomans； forever respectful of

whatever is written； paid no heed to the amount of gold in each ducat—so

long as the inscription remained the same—and these fake Veian gold

pieces flooded Istanbul。 Later； noting that coins with less gold and more

copper were harder； we began to distinguish the coins by biting them。 For

example；　you’re　burning　with　love；　you　go　running　to　Mahmut；　that　youth　of

unsurpassed beauty； beloved by all； first； he takes into his soft mouth the

coin—not the other thing—and biting it； declares it counterfeit。 As a

consequence；　he’ll　take　you　to　Heaven　for　only　half　an　hour　instead　of　one　full

hour。 The Veian infidels； realizing that their counterfeit coins presented

such disadvantages； decided that they might as well counterfeit Ottoman

coins；　reasoning　that　the　Ottomans　would　be　fooled　again。

No