look at one another as we

chatted。 For our eyes would be turned toward some distant spot outside an

open window。 I’m not sure if it was the excitement of recalling something

remarkably beautiful from my halcyon apprenticeship days； or the sincere

regret　I　felt　at　that　moment　because　I　hadn’t　read　the　Koran　for　so　long；　or　the

horror　of　the　crime　I’d　seen　at　the　coffeehouse　that　night；　but　when　my　turn

came　to　speak；　I　grew　confused；　my　heart　quickened　as　if　I’d　e　under　the

threat of some danger； and as nothing else came to mind； I simply said the

following：

“You remember those verses at the end of ”The Cow‘ chapter？ I’d want

most of all to depict them： “Oh God； judge us not by what we’ve forgotten

and　by　our　mistakes。　Oh　God；　burden　us　not　with　a　weight　we　cannot　bear；　as

with those who have gone before us。 Forgive and absolve us of our

transgressions　and　sins！　Treat　us　with　mercy；　my　dear　God。”“　My　voice　broke

and I was embarrassed by the tears I shed unexpectedly—perhaps because I

was wary of the sarcasm that we always kept at the ready during our

apprenticeships　to　protect　ourselves　and　to　avoid　exposing　our　sensitivities。

I thought my tears would quickly abate； but unable to restrain myself； I

began　to　cry　in　great　sobs。　As