st。
During my walks; which grow increasingly longer due to my restlessness; I
e face…to…face occasionally with one of our most pure and innocent
religious countrymen; and a strange notion suddenly enters my head: If I think
19
about the fact that I’m a murderer; the man before me will read it on my face。
Therefore; I force myself to think of different things; just as I forced myself;
writhing in embarrassment; to banish thoughts of women when performing
prayers as an adolescent。 But unlike those days of youthful fits when I couldn’t
get the act of copulation out of my thoughts; now; I can indeed forget the
murder that I’ve mitted。
You realize; in fact; that I’m explaining all these things because they relate
to my predicament。 But if I were to divulge even one detail related to the
killing itself; you’d figure it all out and this would relieve me from being a
nameless; faceless murderer roaming among you like an apparition and
relegate me to the status of an ordinary; confessed criminal who has given
himself up; soon to pay for his crime with his head。 Give me the license not to
dwell on every single detail; allow me to keep some clues to myself: Try to
discover who I am from my choice of words and colors; as attentive people like
yourselves might